I'm happy, wife is not. What now?

confident man marriage advice relationship advice relationship coaching Jun 27, 2021

She's was quiet. Now she's upset. This is a good thing!

Just because your wife is upset, doesn't mean you're saying or doing the wrong things. This is normal as you become more happy within yourself. This is very common among the men in our coaching programs and groups.

If she's been silent and completely shut down up until this point, her becoming MORE EXPRESSIVE is a GOOD thing!

 It takes a man about 90 days to learn HOW to STOP messing up and start growing his own life, step-by-step.

 I love seeing the self-confidence and power that ignites within the men in our Great Men Move Mountains coaching programs and within our Private Facebook forum.

 At the 90-day mark, a man who is doing our coaching finds that his wife starts talking with him. At this point, she will bring up EVEN MORE "drama" from the past. This happens because:

  • She's been quiet for a while and not expressing that she's felt disconnected and unsafe.
  • She's even more upset now that he's been working on himself and changing things.
  • She's been carrying a backpack full of rocks of disappointment for a long time.

 My coaching has 3 phases:

  1. Stop
  2. Grow
  3. Ask

 Stop messing up.  Know when and how to shut up.  Stop defending.  Stop arguing and learn how to hold the tension.  Stop asking her dumb questions.

 Grow yourself.  Know who you are as a man.  Know your values and your boundaries and learn how to see yourself and her with high regard.  (If you want to relax and know you are doing the right thing, fill out my contact form for a 1-1 consult call. 

 Ask for what you want unapologetically.  Know what to say and how to say it.  Learn how to go for what you want with balls deep CONFIDENCE and MOJO.

  • As a man, once you learn to hold space for your wife without judgement (for her or yourself), she WILL test your new ability to listen without trying to fix. She wants to FEEL if you're a different man - if you'll respond/react differently than the past. 
  • In the past, you may have reacted badly with judgment, shame, or self-loathing. She wants to FEEL the new, grounded, solid version of you.
  • Her testing won't be pleasant. The key is - slow down time. You do not need to react immediately. Pause, think, feel into yourself. Feel what it would be like to be viewing this situation from the outside-in.

Watch the video to start creating positive and radical shifts in your marriage now.